The Night Santa Went Crazy
by spacemonkey69
Summary: Chandler is determined to prove Phoebe wrong, while she is determined to hide her secret at all costs. A silly story. COMPLETE, please read and review!
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys! This story is...well, it has no point really! There is no real reason for me to write it, but I was listening to the song 'the night santa went crazy' by weird al, and i thought 'man i have to put that in a story somehow!" so i did...a silly, pointless story but hey! Arent all stories pointless and silly? Anyway, this is most likely only going to be a couple of chapters long, so i will prolly update soon! Please read and review (no flames please) and i will see you kids in the movies!

I do not own friends/ weird al/ characters/actors, but i would love to see Matt Perry singing 'The Night Santa Went Crazy"

* * *

She was so screwed.

Maybe they had forgotten?

Maybe it had slipped their minds?

Maybe it didn't matter that she wasn't prepared. That she had promised them something that she couldn't give them.

She sighed.

The first time she had ever had trouble writing a song, and it was the first time she had promised something special. The first time they had really expected it.

And she had writers block.

Well…singers block really.

She let out another sigh, praying that they had forgotten.

With that one final prayer she opened the door.

"Hey Phoebe!" Monica greeted from the couch. A fake smile covered Phoebe's face as she attempted to hide her guitar from her friends. Maybe if they didn't see it, they wouldn't remember.

"Hey!" she greeted brightly.

"So, Madame Buffay, I believe you have an original song for us? Something that, I'm sure, we have all been _dying _to hear! I know I have, I've barely slept, because of the excitement!" Phoebe didn't notice the sarcasm in Chandler's voice. She was too busy freaking out.

She could always tell them that she didn't have anything, but that wasn't Phoebe. She had made a promise and she was going to keep that promise. Even if it meant bending the rules slightly.

"Yeah Pheebs, we are all so excited!" Rachel added as Phoebe took off her coat.

"I'm sure you are," Phoebe let out a nervous laugh then picked up her guitar once more. She reluctantly walked over to the group, seeing them looking at her expectantly. She let out another nervous giggle then sat down on the table, taking extra time to position her guitar so that it was _just _right.

Apparently she took too long because Ross soon cleared his throat.

"Uh Pheebs? I know you love your guitar, but could we, uh, hurry this up? I have to go pick up my son soon."

"Ross, a true artist must be perfectly prepared," Phoebe reminded him in annoyance, then went back to positioning her guitar. She saw Chandler raise his eyebrows out the corner of her eye.

"I think someone's stalling," he singsonged, a small smirk on his face.

"I think someone's stalling," Phoebe mocked, giving him a glare. "I am not stalling! I'm just preparing!"

"I think somebody is nervous," Rachel piped up, smiling.

"Why…why would I be nervous? I never get nervous!" Phoebe's voice said otherwise, and she cleared her throat.

"I think you are! Maybe you aren't…prepared?" Monica's voice irked Phoebe and she glared at her friend.

"I am prepared! I'll show you, right now!"

"Then do it, right now!" Joey had a huge smile on his face, which also annoyed Phoebe. Probably because she had no idea what she was about to do.

"Oh, I'm gonna!"

Phoebe took a deep breath, quickly scanning her mind for a song; any song that her friends may not recognise. A song stuck out among all the others and she smiled. Yep, that was the one.

"Okay, here we go!" she glanced up at her waiting friends, then took another deep breath and began to sing; strumming her guitar strings along to the song she knew so well.

"Down in the workshop all the elves were makin' toys  
For the good Gentile girls and the good Gentile boys  
When the boss busted in, nearly scared 'em half to death  
Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath  
From his beard to his boots he was covered with ammo  
Like a big fat drunk disgruntled Yuletide Rambo  
And he smiled as he said with a twinkle in his eye,  
'Merry Christmas to all - now you're all gonna die!'  
The night Santa went crazy  
The night St. Nick went insane  
Realized he'd been gettin' a raw deal  
Something finally must have snapped in his brain  
Well, the workshop is gone now, he decided to bomb it  
Everywhere you'll find pieces of Cupid and Comet  
And he tied up his helpers and he held the elves hostage  
And he ground up poor Rudolph into reindeer sausage  
He got Dancer and Prancer with an old German Luger  
And he slashed up Dasher just like Freddy Krueger  
And he picked up a flamethrower and he barbequed Blitzen  
And he took a big bite and said, 'It tastes just like chicken!'  
The night Santa went crazy  
the night Kris Kringle went nuts  
now you can't hardly walk around the North Pole  
without steppin' in reindeer guts  
there's the National Guard and the F.B.I.  
There's a van from the Eyewitness News  
and helicopters circlin' 'round in the sky  
and the bullets are flyin', the body count's risin'  
and everyone's dyin' to know, oh Santa, why?  
My my my my my my  
You used to be such a jolly guy  
Yes Virginia, Now Santa is dead

Some guy from the swat team blew a hole through his head  
Yes little friend now, that's his brains on the floor,  
I guess they won't have the fat guy kicking around anymore  
But now there's no more presents for children's enjoyment  
And the Elves have to wait in the line and file for unemployment  
And they say Mrs. Clause, she's on the phone every night  
With her lawyer negotiating the movie rights  
They're talkin' bout - the night Santa went crazy  
The night St. Nicholas flipped  
Broke his back for some milk and cookies  
Sounds to me like he was sick of gettin' gypped  
Woo, the night Santa went crazy  
The night St. Nick went insane  
Realized he's gettin' a raw deal  
Something finally must have snapped in his brain  
Woo, something finally must have snapped in his brain  
Tell ya, something finally must have snapped... in his brain."

Phoebe glanced up from her guitar, and gauged her friend's reactions. They were staring at her, their mouths hanging open.

"Well, that was…" Rachel trailed off, looking at her friends helplessly.

"I thought…" Monica glanced at Joey for assistance.

"The lyrics were…"

"They were very inventive!" Ross finished Joey's sentence. They all nodded emphatically, with the exception of Chandler.

"And very familiar," he said instead of nodding. Phoebe stopped herself from reacting. Crap, she thought. He was on to her.

"F-Familiar? They aren't familiar! I made them up by myself," she insisted. Chandler shook his head.

"I don't think so."

"Ya huh!"

"Phoebe, that was a Weird Al song, I'm sure of it!" Chandler exclaimed.

"Weird Al? I don't even know who that is," Phoebe lied, standing up.

"Yes you do, I've heard you singing along to his songs!"

"No I don't! Seriously!"

"Oh, seriously? Oh, I'm convinced!" Chandler said sarcastically.

"Chandler, if she says she wrote it, then she wrote it!" Rachel broke in.

"Yeah! Thank you Rachel." Phoebe smiled at Chandler charmingly. He stood up so that he could look Phoebe in the eye.

"Oh, she didn't write it. I know she didn't write it…and I'm gonna prove it."

"Oh really?" Phoebe said defiantly, but inside she was freaking out. He was going to ruin everything. It had been going so well, and now he was going to expose her. She couldn't let that happen.

"Yes, really!"

"Chandler, why does this matter so much to you man?" Joey piped up.

"Because…because it gives me something to do! Instead of being bored at work, I can prove Phoebe wrong. And I am _so _going to prove her wrong."

"I'd like to see you try." Phoebe and Chandler stared at each other, daring the other to say something. Phoebe was going to beat him. She wasn't going to let him reveal her secret. She would do anything and everything to stop the truth from coming out.

"Okay, well, while you two sort this all out, we're going to go get some coffee." Monica stood up, and headed to the door, the other three following.

"I'll be down in a minute," Chandler called after them.

"Yeah, me too!" the door closed and Phoebe stepped closer to Chandler, poking him in the chest. "I am going to fight you Chandler Bing and I am going to win."

"Please! I am so going to prove you wrong, because I _know _that Weird Al sang that song and I can easily prove it! I have his cd in my apartment."

"You better keep a close eye on that cd, it may suddenly disappear," Phoebe said coolly.

"You wouldn't dare-"

"Oh, oh! Wouldn't I?" Chandler scowled.

"I will find another way."

"And I will fight you every step of the way…every time you leave the room, I will be there. Every time you go searching for proof, I will be there. Every time you do anything…I am totally going to be there! Now, if you will excuse me…" Phoebe started to walk to the door, and Chandler quickly followed her.

"Where…where are you going?"

"Oh, I'm going to your apartment…that cd is going out the window Mr Bing!"

"No, wait! Pheebs!" Chandler raced after Phoebe, who was giggling.

The race was on.


	2. Chapter 2

Sigh...do you all remember back in the old days, in the first three seasons, when Chan and Pheebs would always have their little moments? You know, the donald duck conversation, singing together, talking about Spiderman...I loved those moments so much, they were so great together, and it still annoys me that they stopped doing that...anyway, I am trying to capture the fun and silliness that those two had, because they really are so wonderful together! I hope I am doing a good job too hehe. If anybody has any ideas on this story, please let me know...I am probably going to finish it next chapter, but I may be able to slip something in, if someone has any requests...other then that, not much else! Please read and review and I love you! Oh, and seeing I am Australian, I have no idea how much things cost in America...so if my pricing is a bit off...just smile and nod, okay?

I do not own friends/actors/characters, but I do own a woodland of wonderful flying creatures...okay, no more caffiene for me!

* * *

"Wow…cd's really fly well, don't they?"

Chandler glared at Phoebe as she spoke, the pair making their way down the street.

"I loved that cd, you know…it was one of my favourites!"

"Well, now it can be a homeless person's favourites!" Chandler rolled his eyes.

"I can't believe you did that! But you know what, it doesn't matter! I can buy it again; in fact…oh look! A cd shop! Bye bye!"

Phoebe stared at Chandler's retreating form for a moment, then raced after him.

"Wait! We were meant to meet the guys at Central Perk!" she exclaimed, grabbing his arm.

"Oh, we're gonna meet them! We're gonna meet them with a little friend called the _truth! _That's right baby! It's all coming out! You are so busted! Nyaha!" Chandler did his victory dance and Phoebe felt like kicking his legs out from under him. Instead, she smiled sweetly.

"Okay, fine…you go to your little cd shop…you find your little cd. It isn't going to prove anything, the song isn't on there," she insisted. Chandler stared at her blankly.

"Phoebe…you just threw the cd out the window! _After _checking to see if the song was on there! Is there really _any _point in still pretending?"

"Shh…they might be listening!" Phoebe looked around suspiciously, and Chandler found himself following her gaze. Feeling ridiculous, he let out a small groan.

"Okay…I am going into this store…I am going to prove you wrong, and they are going to know, and I am going to laugh, and you are going to be busted, and you are going to feel bad, and I am going to be the coolest guy who ever walked this planet!"

"Wow…I was totally not listening to that at all," Phoebe said offhandedly. Chandler glowered at her for a moment.

"I'm going to get the cd…you wanna come in and try and stop me? Stop the pain from hitting you again? The pain of failure?"

"I _really _do not like this side of you Chandler Bing…but no, I think I will stay out here, and wait," Phoebe said, smiling once more. Chandler eyed her suspiciously.

"R-Really? But…but how will you stop me from out here? Unless….unless you are going to, like, trip me when I come out and run away with the cd, leaving me broken and bruised on the ground?"

"No, I am not going to do that…I just don't see any point in going in with you, that's all," Phoebe claimed. Chandler continued to look at her strangely, then shrugged.

"Alright…your loss…but you must be prepared to be outed _very _soon!"

"Oh, I'm prepared alright…you go and you get your precious cd…I'll be waiting." Phoebe winked at Chandler, who cocked his head in confusion. Blinking a few times, he turned and walked into the store. Phoebe let a small grin cover her face, then turned and walked into the jewellery store next door.

The pair met outside the stores minutes later, Chandler looking put out while Phoebe looked innocent.

"Where is my wallet?" Chandler asked coolly. Phoebe glanced at him in surprise.

"Oh? It's not in your pocket? That is so _unlikely!"_ She grinned at Chandler, who continued to stare at her.

"When did you take it?"

"Chandler, I didn't take it…I would _never _do anything like that! And on a completely different subject, look what I just bought!" she held her wrist out and Chandler glanced at it briefly, then did a double take at her new bracelet.

"Is…is that gold?" he exclaimed.

"Ya huh! And I for one just have to say _thanks _ever so much for buying it for me! I love it so much!"

"_What? _You used my money to buy that? That must have cost-"

"465 dollars…and I didn't use your money! I used your credit card!" Phoebe let out a small laugh as Chandler's face started to turn red. "That's right Chandler Bing; you've met your match!"

"That is going back, right now!"

"Nuh uh! This is my birthday present from you!"

"I already got you a birthday present!" Chandler yelled.

"No you didn't! You said that you ordered something but it never came! And that was months ago! You owe me a birthday present! And this is what this is! Sparkly, huh?"

"Phoebe!" Chandler took a few deep breaths, calming himself slightly. "You do realise that I _need _that money? I mean, somebody has to feed Joey!"

"Let Monica do it! Besides, you have a lot more money in there…in fact, I could do with some new shoes…" Phoebe trailed off, raising her eyebrow suggestively. Chandler held out his hand.

"Give me my wallet."

"No way!"

"Give it to me!"

"Oh, you want it? You really want it? Do you?"

"No, I was just demanding it because I like the sound of my own voice at this decibel …give it to me!"

Phoebe rolled her eyes, and reached into her pocket. "Okay, but you are being _really _childish about this…here." She held out Chandler's wallet and he made a grab at it, but she pulled back at the last second. "Oh! Oh no! Oh, look!" she jammed the wallet down the front of her pants, then looked at Chandler pitifully. "Oh no…look where it went!" Chandler raised an eyebrow.

"I'll go in there."

"You wouldn't dare!"

"Oh really? Well come here, and watch me _not _shove my hand down you pants! Oh wait, that isn't right! I'm going in!" Phoebe let out a shriek as Chandler lunged for her, jumping back from his reach.

"Okay…I'll make you a deal…I'll give you back your wallet, and _think _about taking back the bracelet…which means you will owe me a birthday present by the way…I'll do that if you give up on this whole proving me wrong thing!" Chandler considered her words for a moment, while Phoebe watched him warily.

"Hmm…to give up on it would mean me losing my dignity…and I have already lost that so many times that it is beginning to hurt…so money, or dignity? Hmm…no deal!" he lunged for Phoebe once more and she let out another shriek, then bolted down the street, Chandler hot on her heels as she screamed:

"No! No! Noooo!"


	3. Chapter 3

Yes! Yes! Yes! I did it! I finally did it! Hmm, maybe added stress _is _a good thing? Anyway, I've been trying to finish this one for a while, simply so that I didn't have five stories on the go...yeah, because getting rid of one is _such_ an improvement...anyway, and plus I really wanted to finish this, because I quite like it! So yeah, it's done, all happy happy joy joy, and now I'm gonna go attempt Fools Rush In and/or Smoke and Mirrors...or maybe my assignment? But that's not fun! So please read and review and I love you! Oh, if Chan seems a bit...mean in this...who cares! He does have a dark side, after all AWOOHOO!

I do not own friends/actors/characters/weird al, but I do own a case of the hungry belly! I need food!

* * *

A peaceful calm had fallen over the apartment, getting a much needed break from the commotion that endlessly took place. In the distance, you could head bird chirping happily, making their joy well known. Cars drove past, but their noise was a welcome one too.

Footsteps bounded up the stairs, accompanied by wild shrieks, and Phoebe burst through the door.

"You aren't getting it Chandler!"

"You…can run…really fast," Chandler panted, stumbling into the apartment. Phoebe grinned widely, stepping behind the dining table.

"You are _really _out of shape Chandler."

"What are you talking about? I go to the gym…never…" Chandler trailed off, a thoughtful look covering his face. It cleared after a moment, and he looked at Phoebe dangerously. "Now, back to me getting in your pants."

"Nuh uh, I swore to myself a long time ago that none of you buys would ever get your hands down there…well, except Joey…and Ross."

"Hey!"

"I'm kidding!"

"Well, I'm not…now come here!" Chandler took off after Phoebe again, his short pause all the rest he had needed. Phoebe's eyes widened at the sight of her friend running at her once more, and in a split second call, she leapt for the couch. Chandler watched as the blonde miscalculated the distance and went flying over the couch, then shrugged and dived over as well, rolling on top of her.

"Oof! Chandler…you definitely need to go to the gym…I can't breathe!" Phoebe exclaimed. Chandler grinned and reached down to get his wallet, but let out a cry as Phoebe bit him on the shoulder.

"Ow! You little…hey! Stop it! Pheebs!" Chandler rolled off as Phoebe continued to bite him, then glared at her as he recovered.

"If you get to play rough, then so do I!" Phoebe laughed, quickly jumping to her feet and heading for the doorway. "I'm gonna go flush it!"

"In my toilet?" Chandler asked, still on the floor.

"Yes!"

"_Ha! _That toilet won't flush! Joey clogged it this morning!"

Phoebe paused, her face twisting into that of a disgusted look. While she was contemplating what to do, Chandler had made his way to his feet. Before she could blink, Phoebe had once more found herself on the ground, with Chandler on top.

"Ooh, you mean…boy!" she screamed, struggling wildly beneath him.

"Why do girls always seem to fight me when I try to get into their pants?" Chandler wondered as he grabbed Phoebe's wrists with one hand; his other hand reaching down to where his wallet still lived. Phoebe let out a cry, then tried to bite him once more, but Chandler knew to dodge her mouth this time. "Too slick for you Pheebs!"

"Hey! Not the button…ooh!" Chandler smiled in victory, Phoebe's jeans finally undone. She let out a giggle as his hand snaked down, searching for the wallet.

"Where the hell…"

"Keep searching…I'm actually starting to enjoy this."

Chandler stopped and gave Phoebe an odd look. Before he could speak, the door opened and their friends walked in.

"Oh my…" Rachel gasped while everyone else gaped at the scene in front of them. Chandler and Phoebe glanced at one another, then down at her crotch, then up to where he had her arms pinned down. They glanced back at one another then up at the group, both letting out a laugh.

"This…this isn't…"

"What it looks like," Phoebe finished for Chandler. Monica raised an eyebrow.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah…we were just…this isn't what it looks like!"

"Chandler, you have your hand down her pants!" Ross exclaimed. Chandler quickly yanked his hand up, blushing slightly.

"And you still have Phoebe pinned to the ground," Rachel reminded him after a beat.

"Right!" Chandler quickly climbed off of Phoebe and stood to his feet, then leaned down to help her up. They stood side by side, both grinning shamefully at the group.

"Pheebs…your pants…" Phoebe frowned at Ross for a moment, and then glanced down.

"Oh yeah!" she quickly did her pants up, then turned to Chandler. "I forgot you had managed to undo them…you're very nimble with your fingers!"

"Dude!" Joey grinned at Chandler, looking mighty proud of his friend. Chandler rolled his eyes.

"I guess…you guys are curious as to why…Pheebs and I were doing that…"

"Well, I think it speaks pretty clearly for itself!" Monica exclaimed, causing Phoebe to smirk.

"Does it Monica?"

"Uh…ya!"

"Okay, here's the deal…Phoebe and I weren't about to conduct the physical act of love, nor was I taking advantage of her…I was simply just getting my wallet back."

"Your wallet?" Ross seemed unsure, so Chandler glanced at Phoebe desperately.

"I don't know what he's talking about…all I know is that, one minute I was trying to go find you guys, and the next minute, he had me pinned to the ground!"

"Chandler!" Rachel scolded. Chandler glared at Phoebe, who managed to hide her smile behind the distressed look.

"I did not! Look, she has my wallet! Here, I'll prove it to you!" Chandler reached out a hand towards Phoebe's crotch, but was stopped by Ross grabbing his arm.

"Hey, hey, hey!"

"What? You don't actually believe her, do you?"

When the group didn't answer, Chandler rolled his eyes once more, then sent another desperate look Phoebe's way. She sighed.

"Okay, fine, I have his wallet down my pants, whatever."

"You do?"

"Yes Ross, I do!"

"Thankyou! Now can I have it back?"

Phoebe glanced at Chandler's outstretched hand for a moment, then rolled her eyes and reached into the back of her pants and pulled the wallet out. "Here."

"…I thought it was down the front of your pants?"

"Yeah, I moved it while you weren't looking," Phoebe laughed. Chandler paused, then nodded slowly.

"No wonder I couldn't find it."

"Hey, you could have kept looking, I wasn't really complaining after a while." She winked at Chandler, causing Ross to roll his eyes.

"Can someone please explain what is going on here? Pheebs, why did you have Chandler's wallet down your pants?"

"Yeah Pheebs, why did you have my wallet down your pants?" Chandler repeated, smiling deviously at Phoebe. She shifted uncomfortably, not liking the way everyone was looking at her.

"Because…I took it so that Chandler wouldn't be able to buy…something…"

"And what was that something?" Chandler urged, looking like he should have been dancing on the roof.

"Well, it wasn't a CD, I'll tell you that!" she let out a nervous laugh, to which Rachel cocked her head at. "Okay fine! It was the Weird Al CD! I lied! Chandler was right, I didn't write that song, Weird Al did! Are you happy now? Are you? You've _ruined me!"_

"You mean…Chandler wasn't lying?" Joey asked after a moment.

"This is the best moment of my life…I'm right _and _I got to feel up Phoebe…life is _great!"_

"Okay, calm down Chandler…Pheebs, why did you do that?"

"Because Rach…I forgot! I'm sorry!" she stomped over to the table childishly and sat down, dramatically hiding her face in her arms.

"Well…this is unexpected," Monica said a moment later. Chandler cleared his throat, then bent over to whisper in Phoebe's ear.

"By the way, you owe me 465 dollars," Phoebe jerked up and gave him a cold glare, causing Chandler to back away. "Okay, maybe not! Jeez!"

* * *

"Hey guys!" Phoebe said, walking into the apartment. She set her guitar down on the table, and walked over to the couch. "What's up? You aren't watching any TV or…anything!" 

"We were waiting for you Pheebs," Joey said, looking at her oddly. Phoebe grinned.

"Oh, thanks! Yay, I feel important!" she sat down next to Ross and reached for a handful of potato chips.

"Uh…Pheebs?" Rachel said a moment later.

"What?"

"We're still waiting."

"What? I'm already here!"

"Phoebe, we're waiting for the song you promised…four days ago…you know, after Chandler had his hands down your pants," Rachel reminded her. Phoebe choked on the chip that was in her mouth, then swallowed nervously.

"Oh…that…yeah, I know! I was just getting something to eat first…I'll get my guitar!" she stood up and made her way over to the table, muttering to herself.

She was so screwed. How could she have forgotten after that? How could she have forgotten about the one way that she could redeem herself musically in their eyes?

"For the record…it was only one hand Rach," Chandler said as Phoebe made her way back over, guitar in shaking hand.

"Dude, why are you trying to correct her? It sounds better her way!" Joey exclaimed.

"Okay, _shh!" _Phoebe sat down on the table, guitar in hands. What was she going to do? She couldn't tell them that she hadn't written anything again, that was stupid. She was going to have to do the same as last time, except with a different song. Chandler couldn't know _all _the songs.

"Okay Pheebs! Come on, let's hear it!" Chandler clapped his hands together, looking at Phoebe expectantly, a glint in his eye. Phoebe swallowed again, feeling as if she was about to implode.

"O-Okay…here we go!"

"This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
Couldn't think of any lyrics  
No I never wrote the lyrics  
So I'll just sing any old lyrics  
That come to mind, child  
You really need words  
Whole lotta rhyming words  
You gotta rhyme so many words, mm-mm  
To do it, to do it, to do it, to do it  
To do it, to do it right, child  
This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
I know that you're probably sore  
'Cause I didn't write any more  
I just didn't get to complete it  
So that's why I gotta repeat it  
This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
Oh I make a lotta money  
They pay me a ton of money  
They're payin' me plenty of money  
To sing this song, child  
I gotta fill time  
Three minutes worth of time  
Oh, how will I fill so much time, mm-mm  
I'll throw in a solo, a solo, a solo  
A solo, a solo here  
This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
This song is just six words long  
This song's got nothin' to say  
But I'm recording it anyway  
I know if I put my mind to it  
I know I could find a good rhyme here  
Oh, you gotta have-a music  
You need really catchy music  
This song has got plenty of music  
But just six words, child  
And so I'll sing' em over  
And over and over and over  
And over and over and over, mm-mm  
And over and over and over  
And over and over and over again  
Six words long, six words long  
Six words long, six words long  
Six words long, six words long  
This song is just six words long  
It's just six words long."

She finished with a flourish, then glanced up at the group expectantly. They all stared back at her.

"You couldn't even pick a song from a different artist?" Chandler exclaimed after a long silence, shaking his head at her. Phoebe's throat tightened.

"W-What…what are you talking about? I-I wrote that…_he's lying again people!"_

"I never lied in the first place!"

"Well, you're lying now! You're just jealous of me! He's just jealous of me! And he's a lying, no good, liar!"

"Pheebs…" Monica stood up and made her way into her bedroom. She came out a moment later, holding a CD up for all to see. Crap, Phoebe thought, looking at the Weird Al CD.

"What? That's just a CD."

"Phoebe, the song you just sang is on here!"

"It is? Let me see that!" Phoebe grabbed the CD and looked at it, then let out a gasp. "Oh! The nerve! This guy stole my song!"

"Phoebe…"

"Okay, fine, I panicked! I forgot again! You guys…you suck!" Phoebe stood up and threw the CD to the ground, then stomped over to the door. The group watched the door shut behind her, then turned to face each other.

"Wow," Joey muttered, leaning back in the chair.

"Yeah," Ross agreed.

"Totally," Rachel murmured. Monica sat down next to Chandler, patting him on the leg.

"Oh, by the way, thanks for buying me this CD." Chandler smirked at her, then switched on the TV, leaning back into the couch.

"It was my pleasure…_believe_ me."


End file.
